Question 1

What are the 3 types of anger?

Accepted Answer

While we all have different emotional reactions, most people resort to the following three types of anger when under distress:

Aggressive anger

When you think about “classic” anger, aggressive anger is likely what comes to mind. People with aggressive anger tend to be hostile, abrasive, and blaming when they get mad. Sometimes, their anger feels explosive- one moment, they might be happy and laidback, and the next, they seem like they’re completely raging.

People with aggressive anger may also use emotional abuse tactics, such as insults or threats. In other cases, they may resort to violence (either towards themselves or others) as a form of control.

Passive anger

Have you ever been told, “I’m fine,” when it was apparent the other person was anything but fine? If so, you’ve been a recipient of passive anger!

Passive anger tends to feel more indirect–people may use the silent treatment, gaslighting, or other forms of “pretending they’re not angry” to get their feelings across. They may also conceal their actual feelings, but instead gossip or spread rumors to seek revenge.

Assertive anger

Assertive anger is the healthiest expression of anger. When someone is assertive, they can communicate their needs and feelings concisely. For example, they may use I-statements like, “I felt angry when you didn’t call after you promised you would.”

Someone who practices assertive anger can assume responsibility for both their feelings and their reactions. If they ever resort to aggressive or passive anger, they quickly recognize this behavior and make a concerted effort to stop it immediately.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Question 2

What is anger management?

Accepted Answer

Anger management is the process of identifying various anger triggers and practicing healthy coping skills to deal with them more efficiently. Anger management isn’t about avoiding, dismissing, or trying to eliminate all anger. After all, anger is a normal reaction, and we commonly experience it when we feel afraid, disrespected, or out of control.

With that in mind, anger management refers to learning how to channel anger more productively and effectively. By recognizing the initial signs of anger, you can practice intervening with yourself before the emotion escalates. Furthermore, continuous practice helps you become more aware of your anger triggers.

Some people practice anger management by simply experimenting with whatever works best for them. Others practice skills they learn in books, workshops, therapy, or in specific anger management classes. Most anger management consists of implementing strategies related to mindfulness, assertiveness, and decreasing how you interpret stress throughout the day.

Mastering anger management often requires time, effort, and continuous practice. It can be challenging to change your usual reactions or behaviors. Keep in mind that it’s normal to experience setbacks during this process. However, committing yourself to learning and implementing change can keep you on the right track.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Question 3

What is the best therapy for anger management?

Accepted Answer

The best therapy for anger management is cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) or psychodynamic therapy, but other forms of can be effective too.

The primary purpose of therapy is to learn ways to manage your anger more effectively when it arises. Therapy can be highly effective in helping a person to manage their anger. In fact, according to the APA, 75% of clients with anger issues improved as a result of therapy.

Here are the top types of therapy used to treat anger issues:

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT)

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), a common type of talk therapy, is a widely-used therapeutic modality designed to help you recognize problematic, automatic thoughts into more realistic ones.

For example, let’s say you get a bad grade on a test. You might think your teacher hates you. A CBT therapist would encourage you to test that evidence and consider an alternative belief, such as “my teacher might have given me a bad grade because I didn’t read the prompt thoroughly,” or “I’m not sure what the teacher thinks of me, so I’m going to set up a meeting to discuss this grade.”

By changing your thoughts, you can ideally reduce the severity of your anger and improve how you respond to it.

Psychodynamic therapy

Psychodynamic therapy is also an evidence-based modality that helps you recognize how past experiences affect your present reactions.

For example, if you had a tumultuous upbringing, a psychodynamic therapist might explore how your childhood impacts your ability to trust others. Or, if you grew up with an abusive parent, a psychodynamic therapist can help you understand and identify why you might repeat similar patterns as an adult.

Anger management classes

Anger management classes can be mandated by a court or attended voluntarily if a person wants help getting their emotions under control. Most classes follow a curriculum that includes information about anger and CBT techniques for improving coping responses.

Of course, anger often coincides with other mental health issues. Therefore, if you struggle with problems like depression, anxiety, or substance use, it’s vital that your treatment also addresses those symptoms.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Question 4

What are the symptoms of anger issues?

Accepted Answer

The symptoms of anger issues can vary from person to person. However, if untreated, they tend to progressively worsen over time.

First, it’s important to remember that the emotion of anger isn’t inherently problematic. Anger is a normal emotion, but how you deal with it can cause issues.

Aggression or violence

Even just one instance of harming yourself or others can result in dire consequences. Violence is never an acceptable way to deal with anger. Instead, it instills a disproportionate amount of shame, fear, guilt, and blame onto someone.

Extreme depression

Some people identify feeling depressed more than they identify with feeling angry. At times, unresolved anger can turn into a sense of hopelessness, which often coincides with depression. Similarly, if you persistently feel worthless, ashamed, or even suicidal, these symptoms may be underlying signs of trapped anger.

Impulsivity

Anger can trigger impulsive desires, such as gambling, shopping, overeating, or making irrational, significant decisions without considering potential consequences. Often, these behaviors emerge out of the intense desire to numb out rather than feel the emotion.

Worsening physical health symptoms

Research shows that persistent anger can wreak havoc on your physical health. For example, anger is associated with coronary heart diseases, diabetes, and disordered eating, all of which can seriously impact your quality of life.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Question 5

Can anger issues be cured?

Accepted Answer

Cure is a strong word, but anger issues can be improved and managed over time. The goal of anger management isn’t about achieving perfection. Instead, it’s more about learning how to identify your triggers and implement healthier coping skills for managing your reactions. The more you practice these new skills, the easier (and more natural) they tend to feel.

Additionally, over time, practicing anger management strategies can help you:

feel more “in control” of your reactions and responses to stress
strengthen your relationships,
practice better impulse control
improve your overall mental health

During stressful times, it’s normal to feel angrier than usual. Change can be difficult.Be prepared for setbacks and obstacles during this process. Growth isn’t always linear, and that doesn’t mean you’re failing.

Working with a therapist that specializes in anger management is usually the most effective treatment. They can collaborate with you to create an effective plan for sustainable change.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Question 6

What are good coping skills for anger?

Accepted Answer

To better cope with anger, it can be helpful to take a step back from the situation and then ask yourself how much control you have over what is happening.

If you don't control the matter, try distracting yourself with a hobby or an activity for 15-20 minutes. You can also make a list of all of your thoughts and feelings under the circumstances and then write down one thing that you could do in response.

Another coping skill, try thanking yourself for having this feeling of anger; letting yourself feel angry feels like an accomplishment instead of something to beat yourself up about.

Another skill for coping with anger is looking at the things you have going for you, even if they are small.

It takes a lot of courage to try and make the best out of an unfavorable situation, but it can be helpful later on after you've calmed down.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

What are the 3 types of anger?

Aggressive anger

Passive anger

Assertive anger

Related questions about anger management

Life is complicated. Finding a therapist shouldn’t be.

Newsletter signup

Get inspiration straight to your inbox.