Tony Langstaff, MS, LMFT

My name is Tony Langstaff and I’m a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. My journey in becoming a therapist was one that could be considered, the “long way around”. Throughout this journey, I’ve made many personal mistakes and lots of poor choices. These decisions have led to heartache, pain, and lost opportunities. But ultimately, I learned I don’t have to stay stuck in that place and I can do better moment by moment. As many others, I grew up in a single-parent home and was raised by a loving mother who did everything she could to ensure me and my three siblings had the best life possible. Her job as a Social Worker in the Los Angeles Department of Children and Family Services was how I learned about the field of therapy and helping others. In the years leading up to becoming a therapist, I had sought my own therapy for various struggles…depression (I didn’t realize it at the time), relational conflict, communication issues, a divorce, remarriage, a blended family, and other life stressors. The “long way around” in becoming a therapist meant I would spend two decades in the military, several years working in real estate, and about two years as a military contractor in Afghanistan. Towards the end of my last rotation out of Kandahar, I realized something was missing all those years. My heart was turning towards something richer and more focused on connecting with others on deeper levels. I began the shift towards becoming a therapist. It is through my own my personal (mis)steps along the way, and my healing that I knew I wanted to work with individuals, couples, and families. I saw a need for men to have a place where they felt comfortable in sharing and learning to be vulnerable. However, that eventually grew to include their wives or partners as well as their families. Nowadays, my practice has become more focused on helping individuals work through trauma, depression, anxiety, relationship problems, life transitions, and career issues. I also specialize in working with couples needing guidance in resolving conflict, improving communication, infidelity issues, and restoring hope. I have worked in various therapy settings including private practice, a close-security prison for men, an addiction treatment center and for the U.S. Air Force as a Military and Family Life Counselor. My therapeutic approach includes Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Solution-Focused Brief Therapy, EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) for trauma, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, and Systemic Family Therapy. My beautiful wife and I have been married for over 20 years and have four amazing children. Our journey while in the military has allowed us to live near the mountains of Alaska, the deserts of Nevada, and the swamps of Georgia. Most recently, we have become “empty nesters” and moved to the Indianapolis area and are loving the cooler weather. We enjoy the outdoors, going on hikes, watching movies, and spending time with our two dogs and three cats! Don’t let fear, anxiety, or pride get in the way of a better life. It’s not easy, but it’s worth it! If you’re ready to take that next step, reach out to me. “Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone.”~ Fred Rogers